A Measure of the characteristics of Romantic Relationships and Friendships
1. Do you accept this person as s/he is?
2. Are you willing to ignore this person’s small sins because of the way you feel about her/him?3. Is it easy for you to forgive this person?4. Does this person disappoint you? (R)Respect5. Do you respect this person?6. Does this person make bad judgments on important matters? (R)7. Does this person bring out the best in you?8. Is this person a good sounding board for your ideas and plans?Trust9. Do you trust this person?10. Can you count on this person in times of need?11. Does this person ever forget your welfare? (R)12. Does this person use things against you that s/he shouldn’t? (R)
13. Do you and this person openly discuss personal matters?14 Do you confide in this person?
15. Do you feel that there are things about you that this person just would not understand?(R)
16. Do you feel some things about yourself are none of this person’s business?(R)Understanding17. Do you know what kind of person s/he is?18. Is this person’s behavior surprising or puzzling to you?(R)19. Do you know this person’s faults and shortcomings?20. Do you know about this person’s past?
21. Does this person dominate your thoughts?22. Does it give you pleasure just to watch or look at this person?23. Do you think about this person even when you are not with him/her?Exclusiveness24. Are there things that you do only with this person?
25. Do you have feelings about this person that you couldn’t have about others?
26. Would you feel betrayed or hurt if this person had the same relationship with someone else that s/he now has with you?27. Do you and this person have your own way of doing things?Sexual Intimacy28. Are you sexually intimate with this person?29. Do you find this personal sexually attractive?30. Do you enjoy being touched by this person and touching him/her?
Giving the utmost31. Can you count of this person to lend you a substantial sum of money?
32. Can you count on this person to risk personal safety to help you if your were in danger?33. Can you count of this person to give the utmost on your behalf?
34. Are you prepared to make a significant sacrifice on this person’s behalf?Championing
35. Can you count on this person to let you know how others feel about you?
36. Can you count on this person to support you in an argument or dispute with others?
37. Can you count on this person to champion your interests where there is a conflict between your interests and those of others?Assistance38. Can you count on this person to come to your aid when you need help?39. Can this person count on you for help when s/he is in need?
40. Can you count on this person to tell you what s/he really thinks about issues regardless of whether he or she agrees with you?
41. Do you tell this person exactly what you think about important issues regardless of whether he or she agrees with you?
42. Are you happy in your relationship with this person?43. Has your relationship with this person satisfied your needs?*44. Has your relationship with this person been a success?Enjoyment45. Do you enjoy doing things with this person more than with others?
46. Do you enjoy doing things with this person that you otherwise would not enjoy?47. Do you enjoy this person’s company?Reciprocity
48. Does your partner share the same feeling for you that you have for him/her?49. Does this person really care about you as a person?
50. Do you feel that your partner cares for you as much as you care for him/her?Esteem51. Does your partner make you feel worthwhile and special?52. Does your partner make you feel proud of yourself?
Conflict53. Do you fight and argue with this person?54. Does this person treat you in unfair ways?55. Is there tension in your relationship with this person?Ambivalence56. Are you confused or unsure of your feelings toward this person?57. Do you feel that this person demands too much of your time?58. Do you feel trapped in this relationship?
Scales not included in global scales
59. Do you talk with this person about your relationship?
60. Do you and this person try to work out difficulties that occur between you?
61. Are you trying to change things that you do to make the relationship better between the two of you?Commitment62. Are you committed to staying in your relationship?63. Does this person measure up to your ideals for a life partner?*64. How likely is it that your relationship will be permanent?*65. How committed is your partner to this relationship?Coercion
66. Has your partner ever forced you to do something that you did not want to do?
67. Have you ever forced your partner to do something that s/he did not want to do?Equality68. Is your relationship one of equals?
· Passion and Satisfaction
This instrument can be found on pages 4-6 The Relationship Rating Form (RRF)‚ A Measure of the characteristics of Romantic Relationships and Friendships. available online at: http://people.cas.sc.edu/daviske/LoveFriendsMeasure_rrf.pdf
1= Not at all; 2 = very little; 3 = Slightly (or rarely); 4 = somewhat (not often); 5 = a fair amount; 6 = very much; 7 = a great deal; 8 = strongly (almost always)‚ and 9 = Completely or extremely
While a 9-point scale is preferred‚ a 7-point scale will give approximately the same results. To use a 7 point format delete responses 4 and 6 from the 9-point format.
Responses to each item within a subscale (or global scale) are summed‚ with reversed scored items being subtracted from 10 (for 9-point format) or 8 (for the 7-point format. In reporting scores‚ the summary scores have been divided by the number of items in the scale so that scale values can be directly related to the 9-point scale.
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