Think about how you handle conflict with your romantic partner. Specifically‚ think about a significant conflict issue that you and your partner have disagreed about recently. Using the scale below‚ fill in which response is most like how you handled conflict. If you do not have a romantic partner‚ respond with your most current partner in mind. If you have never been in a romantic relationship‚ answer in terms of what you think your responses would most likely be.
For each item‚ answer as follows:
A = Strongly agree with statement
B = Moderately agree with statement
C = Neutral‚ neither agree nor disagree
D = Moderately disagree with statement
E = Strongly disagree with statement
1. We try to find solutions that are acceptable to both of us.
2. We often resolve conflict by talking about the problem.
3. Our conflicts usually end when we reach a compromise.
4. When my partner and I disagree‚ we consider both sides of the argument.
5. In order to resolve conflicts‚ we try to reach a compromise.
6. Compromise is the best way to resolve conflict between my partner and me.
7. My partner and I negotiate to resolve our disagreements.
8. I try to meet my partner halfway to resolve a disagreement.
9. The best way to resolve conflict between me and my partner is to find a middle ground.
10. When we disagree‚ we try to find a solution that satisfies both of us.
11. When my partner and I have conflict‚ we collaborate so that we are both happy with our decision.
12. My partner and I collaborate to find a common ground to solve problems between us.
13. We collaborate to come up with the best solution for both of us when we have a Problem.
14. We try to collaborate so that we can reach a joint solution to a conflict.
15. My partner and I try to avoid arguments.
16. I avoid disagreements with partner.
17. I avoid conflict with my partner.
18. When my partner and I disagree‚ we argue loudly.
19. Our conflicts usually last quite a while.
20. My partner and I have frequent conflicts.
21. I suffer a lot from conflict with my partner.
22. I become verbally abusive to my partner when we have conflict.
23. My partner and I often argue because I do not trust him/her.
24. When we argue‚ I am easily frustrated.
25. When we have conflict‚ I usually feel hurt.
26. Conflict with my partner often causes strong emotions.
27. When we have conflict‚ we withdraw from each other for a while for a “cooling off” period.
28. When we disagree‚ we try to separate for a while so we can consider both sides of the argument.
29. When we experience conflict‚ we let each other cool off before discussing it further.
30. When we have conflict‚ we separate but expect to deal with it later.
31. Separation for a period of time can work well to let our conflicts cool down.
32. When we argue or fight‚ I try to win.
33. I try to take control when we argue.
34. I rarely let my partner win an argument.
35. When we disagree‚ my goal is to convince to my partner that I am right.
36. When we argue‚ I let my partner know I am in charge.
37. When we have conflict‚ I try to push my partner into choosing the solution that I think is best.
38. When we have conflict‚ I usually give in to my partner.
39. I give in to my partner’s wishes to settle arguments on my partner’s terms.
40. Sometimes I agree with my partner so the conflict will end.
41. When we argue‚ I usually try to satisfy my partner’s needs rather than my own.
42. I surrender to my partner when we disagree on an issue.
43. How similar are you and your partner in the way you handle conflict?
(A) Completely similar Different‚ (B)‚ (C) Somewhat‚ (D)‚ (E) Extremely similar
Tammy Lowery Zacchilli‚ 2007. The Relationship Between Conflict and Communication‚ Sex‚ Relationship Satisfaction‚ and other Relational Variables in Dating Relationships. A Dissertation In EXPERIMENTAL PSYCHOLOGY. Texas Tech University
Zacchilli‚ T. D. L.‚ Hendrick‚ C.‚ & Hendrick‚ S. S. (2005‚ April). The development of the Romantic Partner Conflict Scale. Poster session presented at the annual meeting of the Southeastern Psychological Association‚ Nashville‚ TN.