Conditions Of Worth

Conditions of Worth are the conditions we think we must meet in order for other people to accept us as worthy of their love or positive regard. As children, we learn that there are certain things we do that please our parents or caregivers, and we strive to do those things. As we grow up, we also learn what our teachers, friends, and society in general seem to expect from us. Eventually, we internalize the conditions of worth imposed upon us, and live our life according to those conditions. This may result in unhappiness and a lack of self-worth as we strive to satisfy conditions that may be unrealistic.

For example, someone may think that she is inadequate if she does not get straight A’s in school, or she is only acceptable if she fits into a certain dress size.


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